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Natural History

by Daniel Zaitchik

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1.
BEFORE I GO BACK TO THE WHALES Some come from the desert Some come from the woods Some going to the lizard Some going to the wolves The quiet pull you can’t explain The quiet pull that knows your name Says this is where you come from and where you’re going to Mine’s been coming from the water Long as I remember I feel the arm around my waist pull me back to that embrace This is where I come from and where I’m going to But before I go back to the whales I’ll do the things that humans do I’ll smile for real, I’ll smile real fake My heart will heal, my heart will break Before I go back to the whales I only believe in God when I’m on an airplane Taking off or touching down Or when we’re bouncing all around Then I say: I know I’m not one for prayer But if you keep us in the air I’ll be more pious Just don’t let us die, just don’t let us die But if we are going down Let it be off the coast of Provincetown Where the summer people go to see the whales blow Where the summer people beach and the humpbacks breach But before I go back to the whales I’ll flail the way that humans flail I’ll hit my stride then I’ll hit a wall I’ll learn to glide then I’ll damn it all I’ll take a lover, forsake a friend I’ll wake and shutter from dreams that won’t end I’ll have songs to sing but I usually won’t bother I’ll clip my own wings but I’ll blame it on my father I’ll give you my bed We will throb and burn Then I’ll tell you I love you just to hear it in return Before I go back to the whales We all knew it from the start One day soon we all will part Some will howl and some will fly Some will swim and I’m the swimming kind I’m looking forward to being a whale Give me back my flukes, give me back my baleen I think when I become a whale I’ll only say the things I mean I’ll only say what I mean I’ll only say the things I mean I won’t look for meaning I’ll just do what I’m meaning
2.
I will keep you close Songs will be your ghost I won’t stop inviting you Don’t you float so far Ordinary stars don’t need you Don’t know you like I do When you start to slip away You start to slip away I play the music, I play the music When you start to slip away You start to slip, I play ‘Cause when there’s music I feel you most And songs are ghosts Songs are ghosts I will keep you near Whisper in my ear Remind me, remind me what is true And if you go unbound I will be your sound Come find me, come find a passage through And when I start to slip away I start to slip away You say “there’s music, there’s always music” When I start to slip away I start to slip, you say, “I’ll be the music, you be the host” “The song’s the ghost The song is my ghost” Songs are ghosts Ooo, songs are ghosts Let me keep you young Curl inside my lungs I’ll bring you, I’ll bring you back to earth Don’t you float so far Ordinary stars don’t need you Don’t know how much you’re worth I will keep you close Songs will be your ghost I’ll be your ghost
3.
LOVERS OF VALDARO Long after the ice has melted, long after the flood Long after the meteors, the virus in the blood They will come here digging, yeah, they’ll take a look around They will dig and when they dig they’ll find us in the ground This used to be a city sitting in a country sitting on a continent This used to be a river, used to be a high school, used to be a monument There used to be two people living in a house here, one of many little homes What will they know from the positions of our bones? Will they think we were happy together? Will they think we had something good? Will they think we didn’t know we were dying Cuz the music said we never would? Will they think we held on to each other When we knew that the end was near? Or will they think we held on to each other Will they think we held on like that for years? Long before the moon was settled, long before the bombs This was California and the wind was in the palms I was brewing coffee, you were rinsing out your hair The dogs were eating breakfast, here was jasmine in the air This used to be a country wrapped around a city wrapped around a parking lot Where every Sunday morning they would have a market—radishes and apricots These used to be our mouths, used to be our hands, used to be our microphones What will they discover in what used to be our bones? Will they think we were happy together? Will they think we’d made up our minds? Will they think we were the life of the party? Will they think we were the quiet kinds? Will they think we held on to each other When we knew that the end was near? Or will they think we held on to each other Will they think we held on like that for years? Don’t forget the world was full of light Don’t forget the world the world was full was full of light of light I was brewing coffee, you were rinsing out your hair The dogs were eating breakfast, there was jasmine in the air Do you think we were happy together? Do you think we’d made up our minds? Do you think we were the life of the party? I kinda think we were the quiet kind Do you think we held on to each other When we knew that the end was near? Or do you think we held on to each other Do you think we held on like that for years? Do you think we were happy together? Do you think we had something good? Do you think we ever knew we were dying The music say we never would Yeah, I don’t think we ever knew we were dying The music said we never would
4.
WHEN THE DEER COME I hold my breath whenever the deer come Don’t move the air, don’t wanna scare ‘em Whether in twilight, whether in dawn The stag or the mother and her fawn When I breathe again they are gone Wish I were younger, wish I were stronger Wish pain would go quicker and love would last longer But just when I’m sure nothin’ is true No one hurts half as much as I do The trees move, they’re comin’ through Oh, don’t it make you feel awfully safe and sound? Yeah, it sure does make me feel like what’s lost could be found The seeds are in the ground The sun comes up and down The deer are all around We hold our breath whenever the deer come Winter or spring summer or autumn Nothin’ so quiet, nothin’ so good As their eyes at the edge of the wood We’d follow if we could Oh, let us disappear for a long warm hour (Let us disappear) Turn us into moss, turn us into wild flowers So they won’t know we’re here And we can just be near the deer being deer Oh, don’t it make you feel awfully safe and sound? It sure does make me feel like what’s lost will be found The seeds are in the ground The sun comes up and down The deer are all around Though they run away, though they never stay They’ll come another day We hold our breath We hold our breath
5.
Snow Fox 05:29
SNOW FOX Last time that we met your coat was cinder Now you’ve changed to match the winter I wish I had fur like you Come out, beauty, show your face Queen of all the quiet space Will I ever learn to blur like you? Show me how you hide in the wide open Snow Fox How you go lost How you go Every step that you erase I still follow, still retrace Will I ever stand a chance with you? Was that you or was that just my breath? I swear I’m gonna catch my death out here to catch a glance from you Show me how you hide in the wide open Snow fox How you go lost How… Show me how you blend in How to begin and end in snow Snow fox Snow fox How you go lost In the white wide open In the wild wide open
6.
Firewood 04:30
FIREWOOD Have I always been an old man? Has it always been a winter day? Another cardinal at the window Another cup of Earl Grey Spent the morning listening For the snow on the forest floor I could hear your boots coming Miles before they reached my door Boy, is it firewood you’re looking for, you’re looking for? Or did you come round here wanting more, something more? Sure, I got firewood I cut enough to share Are you gonna come closer Or should I come over there? Tell me do you see an old man? Has the rest of me all disappeared? Silver in the birches Silver in my beard No, I was never beautiful But I knew to use my skin And when the lonely came knocking I knew how to let ‘em in Boy, is it firewood you’re looking for to kiss the storm? Or was there something else you thought could keep you warm? Sure, I got firewood Been sitting for two years or so You gotta let it season if you want it to burn steady and slow Green wood sure smells good But it’s all smoke and smolder Light the dry wood, man You’re safer with something older Soft wood crackles, yeah Oh, but it burns it burns it burns too hot and fast I’ll give you hard wood For a fire that’s built to last Silver in the birches Silver in my beard
7.
FLOWERS THAT BLOOM AT NIGHT My father looked at me when I was young Said you won't show your bloom to everyone Don't give your nectar to the honey bee We spend the sunlight waiting patiently But when the yellow rush of day is through When spider web is jeweled with dew When the crocus and hibiscus and the lotus close The sacred lotus and the moss rose The bats come, and the beetles And the moths hum When the man puts out his light Then you open Take your freedom You're a flower that blooms at night Goodnight Gazania and sweet White Water Lily The Poppy Mallow shuts her blossom And with the falling of the fleeting Morning Glory Arrive the fox and the opossum Hidden crickets start the nocturne Now it's our turn When the Great Grey Owl takes flight She's beholding The unfolding Of the flowers that bloom at night Soon flower, soon flower Wait for the sigh of dusk Moon flower, moon flower Trust in the time for us I know you're tired of being tired I know you want to wake It's true it's part of you, the quiet ache A little sorrow only makes us grow more ravishing A little sorrow is a blessing We're for lovers and new mothers For the wakeful For the ballads that they write And our patience sweetens the fragrance Of the flowers that bloom When the bats come, and the beetles When the moths hum And the man puts out his light Now we open It's our freedom We're the flowers that bloom at night Patience, darling Patience Patience, darling
8.
Pangaea 04:14
PANGAEA Pangaea took her clothes off One piece at a time She threw her sweater northward And kicked her shoes behind And her skirt billowed far into the east And her gloves fell to the other side And all her jewels snapped and scattered And spread the whole world wide Spread the whole world wide Pangaea undressed slowly And when she felt all free She held her breath like a child And sank into the sea Now she’s lying there Naked dreamer Eyes wide open Through the deep With the memory of her clothing Drifting in and out of sleep In and out of peace And I’ve just been sailing Admiring her topography She really did dress well She really did have style When Pangaea took her clothes off She did it very slow Two hundred million Two hundred million Two hundred million Years ago Oooo Two hundred million Years ago
9.
Snails 04:05

credits

released January 31, 2020

all words & music by Daniel Zaitchik
produced by Katmaz

violin: Ludovica Burtone
cello: Laura Dadap
woodwinds: Justin Vance
french horn: Lisa McCormick
trumpet: Mike Nappi
guitar: Jeremy Bass
guitar/bass/etc: Katmaz
harp: Sarajane Williams
voice on track 4: Amber Gray
piano/voice/etc: Daniel Zaitchik

mastered by John Naclerio at Nada Mastering
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This album was made possible through the generous support of producers Gary Nelson, Michael Venn & many others.
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Daniel Zaitchik

Daniel Zaitchik is a singer-songwriter, theatre maker, and other-things maker.

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